Pragmatic Compendium

Thanks to my longtime friend, Renee for the following reminder. This is what I was feeling and talking about when I wrote the devotions “i want no regrets” and “what’s next?” on Pragmatic Communion.

“A professor stood before his philosophy class and had some items in front of him. When the class began, he wordlessly picked up a very large and empty mayonnaise jar and proceeded to fill it with golf balls. He then asked the students if the jar was full. They agreed that it was.

The professor then picked up a box of pebbles and poured them into the jar. He shook the jar lightly. The pebbles rolled into the open areas between the golf balls. He then asked the students again if the jar was full. They agreed it was.

The professor next picked up a box of sand and poured it into the jar. Of course, the sand filled up everything else. He asked once more if the jar was full. The students responded with an unanimous “yes.”

The professor then produced two cups of coffee from under the table and poured the entire contents into the jar effectively filling the empty space between the sand. The students laughed.

“Now,” said the professor as the laughter subsided, “I want you to recognize that this jar represents your life. The golf balls are the important things—your family, your children, your health, your friends and your favorite passions—and if everything else was lost and only they remained, your life would still be full.

The pebbles are the other things that matter like your job, your house and your car.

The sand is everything else—the small stuff. “If you put the sand into the jar first,” he continued, “there is no room for the pebbles or the golf balls. The same goes for life. If you spend all your time and energy on the small stuff you will never have room for the things that are important to you.

Pay attention to the things that are critical to your happiness. Spend time with your children. Spend time with your parents. Visit with grandparents. Take time to get medical checkups. Take your spouse out to dinner. Play another 18. There will always be time to clean the house and fix the disposal. Take care of the golf balls first—the things that really matter. Set your priorities. The rest is just sand.

One of the students raised her hand and inquired what the coffee represented. The professor smiled and said, “I’m glad you asked.”

The coffee just shows you that no matter how full your life may seem, there’s always room for a couple of cups of coffee with a friend.”

I’ve heard this story before, but with rocks instead of golf balls. I had never heard the ingredients include coffee before.

Renee, since we live so far apart, we’re gonna need to have “virtual” coffee. Don’t you just LOVE free mobile to mobile?

I’ve been reading Grace Based Parenting by Dr. Tim Kimmel. Chapter 7, The Freedom to Be Different really resonated with me. Check out my latest post over at Pragmatic Communion. It’s about giving my daughter the “freedom to be different.”

Here’s a bit of Dr. Kimmel to ponder:

“The primary way to give our children grace is to offer it in place of our selfish preferences. They receive grace when we choose not to commit sins against their heart when our human nature would suggest that it would be okay to do so. In fact, the greatest grace that children receive is when we can even see the sins we are inclined to commit against their hearts followed by our willingness to go against our selfish urges. So much grace is stolen in the heat of the moment by our selfishness. Kids want things, need things, say things or do things that either bother us, embarrass us, or hurt us. But sometimes the reason we are hurt is because we might be exercising immaturity, insecurity or indifference. We take things that are huge to children and trivialize them, or we take small issues and magnify them out of proportion.”

“If you have a different child and remind her about the sacrifice you’ve made to accommodate her quirks, it is not in a context of grace.”

I posted this over at Pragmatic Communion, but it looks like my blogger feeds are freaking out again, so I thought I’d try linking directly from Compendium (on WordPress). I’m thinking I may need to go ahead and move the entire Communion blog over here. Anybody have any advice/experiences with blogger or WordPress which would help me out?